Collateral damage crept in without a sound into my life, and your life without an invite. I realized I had childhood hurts lingering inside, laying dormant, until the time was so right, but wrong. How about you? Have you ever been verbally abused as a child, and felt unloved, or unwanted? How about when your trust was violated, and now you don’t seem to trust your spouse, or love ones? You become so guarded, that life becomes a prison.
As a child, I was told negative things over, and over again that at one point I felt unworthy to be loved by God, or anyone else for that matter. Have you ever went out your way to please others, to be accepted and loved? Have you ever had tried to live up to everyone standards? Follow others advice, never considering your own, or God’s? I did.
I have felt that longing to belong. But now I realize I have all those things, and much more. God didn’t care what color dress I wore, or if my hair was long or short. He did nor care if I had a degree. He accepted me right where I am. Today many want to place you in their perfection box. I have found these individuals to be missing something of their own. They try to fill the void in their life by belittling others.
Sometimes others will find any little fault in you to make themselves look better. If we stop looking at the cracks on the wall (our bodies), we can accept God’s mercy, grace, and love for us. If you try to live up to man’s standards of you, then you will always be defensive, or behave Ungodly in character.
Though I was inflicted with negative words, God’s words says “I am fearfully, and wonderfully made.” My childhood is redefined by God’s grace. So I now look at my life as a collateral gift, and not collateral damage, as the enemy would see fit. God loves me. I say it again. God loves me.
Heavenly Father, thank you for redefining my life. Thank you for turning the cracks into open crevices for your love to seep through. Thank you for healing me. Thank you for not allowing the enemy to devour me. Thank you for drawing near to me during my brokeness. Thank you for accepting me as I am, when man critique, judge, and ridicule me. Amen.
Throw your stones
Whisper bitter words
Hardened your hearts.
Laugh behind my back.
pretend to lend me a helping hand.
You can keep your collateral damage.
My collateral gifts
are here to stay….
here for the kingdom of God,
not for the pleasures of the world.